GRIEVE, GROW, AND BE SEEN

By Zenda Olson, communications & program assistant

“Grief never ends, but it changes. It is a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness nor a lack of faith: it is the price of love.” — author unknown  

If you’ve lost a spouse/life partner, you’re not alone. Support is here.  

Earlier this month, I sat in on a meeting with the Widow Warriors, a support group for women who have lost their life partners.  

The group meets at 1:30 PM on the third Thursday of each month in Rooms 21 & 22. Widow Warriors is a safe, confidential space, so I won’t share stories or exchanges from the meeting. Trust has been built so participants can be vulnerable and honest. I will, however, share with you why I would recommend this group for any woman who has lost a partner.  

As I walked in, I moved tables together and pushed a few chairs into a circle. Almost immediately, I was met with warm smiles and a heartfelt welcome. It was clear to me in those first moments that if I needed support, I would be safe here. And as I sat and listened to these women open up not just about the heaviness of loss, but their day-to-day lives, I saw a resourceful and dedicated community. This is a place where laughter rises alongside grief, and emotions are welcome without judgment. You can come knowing that you don’t have to hide your pain, and you may find others whose experiences mirror your own. And by listening to them, you may see a glimpse into the future at a path forward. Because even through the hardest moments, we keep on living.  

The session I attended was led by Pastor Lindsey Bina. However, the group is typically guided by volunteers Joyce Berg and Marilyn Paulson. They are known for their compassion, fresh perspectives, and thoughtful ways of helping women connect through grief. While not widows themselves, Joyce and Marilyn are trained in peer grief support, and there is a consensus that their leadership and listening have been instrumental to the group’s success. Each session brings new topics, guest speakers, and meaningful conversation. Once you start attending, you won’t want to miss a meeting.  

Words From a Widow Warrior

After the meeting, I spoke with Widow Warrior Barbara “Barb” Wright, whose husband passed away three and a half years ago. She has attended Shepherd of the Valley for a long time, but after her loss, she struggled to return. Through groups like Widow Warriors, she is finding strength to show up again.  

Widow Warriors, she said, is a place where you can bring your full self — where people care, understand, and walk through grief with you.  

“We have this group of ladies, and when you’re here, the tears come and also the joy,” Wright said. “It helps to come here to move through grief. We’re here to help you get here and get out of the house when you’re ready. Once you’re comfortable, give it a try. If you’re not comfortable yet, that’s okay. We will be here when you are.”  

Until you experience the loss of a life partner,  you cannot truly understand it. Wright was candid with me that finding space to bring her full self has helped her heal. It has been valuable for her to connect with other women of faith and re-discover how to move about the world — how to be alone, and how to welcome joy again.  

“Some conversations may bring you out of your comfort zone, but it’s good,” Wright said. “It will help. Sometimes we need to be urged to take that step.”  

Growing Through Loss at SOTV

In addition to Widow Warriors, Wright also found initial support through Growing Through Loss, a 14-church coalition offering a five-week session for those grieving a loved one. Shepherd of the Valley will host their fall series on Tuesday evenings: September 15, 22, and 29, and October 6 and 13, 2026.  

Each session is complete in itself, and participants may attend any or all. Following each speaker, trained facilitators lead table discussions, offering support and space for conversation. One-on-one listeners will also be available. 

You Are Not Alone

There is no time limit on grief. Whether you lost your partner recently or many years ago, you are welcome. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. We all do it differently. What often comes with loss are new challenges and a lot of the unknown. If you’re struggling, let this be a sign to reach out, to find someone to walk with you in this newness through the dark.